what do you call an unpredictable, out of control photographer?
a loose canon
you can tell if your gold chain is fake by leaving the room and listening to see if it talks crap about you to other jewelry.
did you hear about the sensitive burglar?
he takes things personally
what is a trees favorite drink?
what’s the best thing about elevator jokes?
they work on so many levels
what did lil jon do when the hardware store employee tried to sell him a lightbulb?
turned down 4 watt
accidentally broke my irish friend’s pixar movie. he wasn’t amused, but he did say “you cracked me up.”
what do you call the heavy breathing someone makes while trying to hold their downward facing dog pose?
(this joke was told right after doing downward dog, so it was very appropriate)
what do you call crystal clear urine?
why did the yogurt go to the art exhibit?
because it was cultured
what did the earth say to the other planets?
you guys have no life
what did the cannibal say after eating a clown?
this tastes funny
why don’t they play poker in the jungle?
too many cheetahs
what do you call a scent that wanders?
why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
because their “p” is silent
what’s orange and sounds like a parrot?